cake

I put my son to bed almost every night. We read a story, we pray, we turn out the lights (he has to turn the switch off with his foot) and then I lay down with him for a few minutes until he settles down and then it's a hug and a kiss and I'm out the door. Tonight as I left he said "I'll see you in the morning and we'll make cake."

He said it with such confidence and yet I don't know where it came from. We haven't had cake at our house in quite a while and I don't think we've ever made cake in the morning. Why would we? Why would he come up with that. It doesn't seem to have any purpose in the whole scheme of what we would do on a normal Thursday and yet he said it with such confidence. Maybe we'll even make cake tomorrow because he wants to, but at this point I don't think the day is heading in that direction.

I was laughing on the way down the stairs when it kind of hit me that I make plans all of the time without considering what they would look like in the larger scheme of the life that God has planned for me and his world. I'll pray that God would give safety or a protective hand as we do whatever it is we're going to do. I wonder if God sometimes is like "I guess I'll give you safety while you do that, but why are we doing that today. It doesn't make sense in the whole scheme of what I have for you, but ok...safety granted." I realize that God knows everything that I am going to do from now until eternity and works all thing together for good for His glory, but I think that I often "make cake" when I could be doing something right in the middle of God's plan for the world.

I do like cake, though...maybe there'll be some in the house tomorrow night.

love

it seems like it's been forever since i last blogged and my last post date says it's been about a month, so no wonder that's how it feels. I just finished truly enjoying a weekend with friends doing some of the things that I really love. An entire weekend filled doing the things I love. It's been a while since I have really felt that and it really felt great.
I hear people say that they "love" what they do or that they "find meaning" in their jobs and I think back to a time when I felt the same. I know it's possible, I know that people can really mean it, because I have felt the same.
We're all gifted for something. We're all built to fill a purpose in our God's amazing world and we should be doing all that we can to fill those roles and help His kingdom be a reality here and now and yet somehow we find ways to be something other than what we were gifted to be. In my experience God gives us glimpses at points into what He really has for us. Intervals of time where we really feel fulfilled and truly feel like we're making a difference in this world for something positive. They're glimpses, so they aren't complete pictures in order to keep us in a place where we must have faith in order to step out and do that which we were created to do.
So I got to participate in a weekend where I get to hang out with a bunch of people who I love and am completely comfortable with (what an incredible time) I got to teach (I love teaching, it feels like I'm doing what I was meant to do as I am equipping other people to be what they were gifted to do). I got to sing and play music and participate in a worship service (music runs amazingly deep and I love leading worship and entertaining with music) All things that could be a part of a career and yet that is not the trail God has me walking right now.
The questions emerge at this point: should I pursue these things that I love or should I be patient in the circumstance I find myself in and just wait?
When I put it down on this screen instead of just battling it out in my head the answer seems much more clear.
I just want to do what I love.